Ka-Blog!

Imelda Marcos turned 80 a few days ago and celebrated it at Hotel Sofitel.

Wait!  Don’t scoff just yet.  The party wasn’t imeldific at all.  The Sofitel is just a five-star hotel.  She had it built as the Philippine Plaza when she was still the Madame of Malacanang.  But that does not mean anything.  It is not a new palace built for the occasion.  This hotel is a dump compared to where Imelda had parties back in the old days.

Plus, Sofitel is right next door to the ill-fated Film Center where the remains of dozens of construction workers she ordered cemented over when it collapsed during construction lie buried.  How dreadful that our dear former First Lady held a party next to a mausoleum.

Plus, there were no B-class Hollywood actors present.  Some of the old perfumed set and martial law dogs were there but the rest have died or are still abroad enjoying their shares of the loot while the Madame has “No funds! No Funds!”  Not like the old days, indeed.

And while the food was lavish and the (no alcohol) drinks were free-flowing, those were sponsored by friends.

Don’t you people get it?  Imelda is already very poor and is under unjust persecution—for more than two decades already.  I think it is time to give her back her jewels, shoes, underwear and companies’ shares.

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After initially and vehemently denying our beloved President had a boob job while in a swine flu quarantine, Palace lips are now saying it’s true.

But it’s not true that it was a recent operation and that it’s leaky.

(Karengkeng ka ha, Madame.  Did you also get your areola and nipples fixed?)

But let me say this: The President is well within her right to have a proud set of mammary.  I don’t care if it was recently done.  And if, and only if, it is leaky, she is right in having it fixed by the most expensive doctors of the most expensive hospital in this poor country.  I do not want the likes of cosmetic surgeon Hayden Kho doing it.  As much as possible, I do not want Atty Lorelei Fajardo to lie to the people (even though we pay her to do it) when another Haydencam scandal breaks out.

In fact, I support the President, our genuine and kind chief executive, in her desire to have erect twins.  If we can’t have a tall President, it does not speak well of the Philippines to have saggy Chief Pair of Boobs.  Never mind that she is failing our economy and politics; never mind that her administration is responsible for thousands of deaths and hundreds of disappearances; never mind that she wants the Constitution changed; what is important is that the most important jugs in the country are not soggy to the feel.